Raised from the dead I guess

For months I couldn't access this blog. It was deleted. Now it's back. Well I'm here. But I'm not really there anymore.

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I have had a very hard week which brought on an anxiety attack during which I picked off each post and saved it as a draft. The posts are still there but I don't have the heart to repost them all right now. The blog will be back. Bad week.

Okay.

Tell me that you don't see a dragon in this cloud, that is wasn't there the whole time. Go ahead, deny it.

Well

it's time to get serious about this hobby. I'm good at a great many creative things. May I say talented? But I excel at none of those things.

If you're here on this blog looking at these images, and your first response is to say oooo, nice photo - please remember that a comment like this is usually not helpful to most of us - for those of us who have invested in our camera's it's helpful and most wanted to read a thoughtful explanation on why your oooo is important. We need frank - we need blunt to balance out the ego trips one tiny success can send us on. Most of all we need constructive criticism, thoughtful support, and explanation of opinion. The oooo without the why doesn't help us grow past our laurels - [and possibly those that exist in our own imaginations.] More often than not - fluffy encouragement isn't what we need from each other as artists. Artists tend to be lazy, depressed, self-centered and hard on themselves - comments appreciated with these things in mind - sometimes what might seem harsh is really the kindest comment you can make, particularly said with the interests of the artist in mind. Most fellow artists realize this - and being a photoblog connoisseur, it's sometimes painful to see so much praise on the blogs I visit. I don't mean to seem harsh nor exclude commentary but we're all really here doing this to be better than we were when we started out. So why not help each other out?

Shed

Shed in my backyard.

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Again - For some reason the vibrance washes out on color images. This is a real problem.

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Sweet roughneck.

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I wanted to title this image 'the lighting touches of inner souls' but I think I saw that title on a rebirthing blog. So I titled the image 'schnitzel'.

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Nothing terribly interesting about this photo or the man who chewed me out for 'stepping on his property line'.

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Same piece of cloud, different shot, black and white.

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Somehow, I don't know how, when this image was uploaded, it washed the vibrance of the image out. If anyone knows why this happens and has a solution, could you let me know?

Joey @ Work

No photoshop. So now to figure out what I did to get this effect. It was humid out; could that have been it?

LAX

I decided to actually read 6 sentences from my Canon owner's manual this past weekend. Ew. Reading. You might learn something. So I was at LAX today just doing what people do there and this very handsome guy asked my friend for a light. I asked him if his girlfriend would like a copy of the photos and he said 'girls don't like me'. Pulease - how sneaky and charming is he? Anyway, if they like the camera, I'm on them. Most people say yes to me, for some reason.

Self Portrait II

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More Thrills ..

Blogger's small format is a problem. If anyone happens to have a better template whereby photos can be posted in larger sizes, please let me know.

Thrill a Minute ..

I was paid to take photographs today. It was exhausting, and I felt insane since I have no idea how to use this new camera. For 4 hours I chased people and hoped for the best. It was understood I was there to take pictures - so no one hit me! When I arrived I shied away from my duty, and really just wanted to slink away into a corner. Not being outgoing doesn't help. It was sometimes embarrassing - I was called 'the camera lady' at which point I wanted to hide - and it was a very uncomfortable feeling all around - until I forgot where I was and then suddenly I wasn't myself any more.

I can't wait to do it again. I think my new friend below feels the same.

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I haven't really felt like posting anything, or taking pictures.

The kit lens that comes with any Canon SLR leaves lots to be desired. Use a tripod. Unfortunately I didn't.

Two white tea cups and wrappers

Camera: The brand new, beautiful Canon 350D / Kit lens
Shutter Speed: 1/125
Lens Aperture: F/5.6
Flash: not fired
Focal Length: 55mm
F-Number: F/5.6
Exposure Time: 1/125 sec
ISO-800
Exposure Compensation: 0
Image Quality: RAW

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To view it in large click image

I haven't made too much time to do more than just take a few shots and practice. My old, trusty P.O.S really kicked butt - I knew it like the back of my hand. I am in for a long learning curve.

An empty vial

Taken with the 350D. I don't feel like posting the specs, but they are in the image data. All processing was done in the camera except for the red line. The image quality really is amazing. The reviews have not lied.

Saying Goodbye

Please note that this picture needs to be enlarged fully for view. There simply wasn't enough space to point out all the fascinating things, freaky neighbors, oddities, directions from which vandals operated, unfriendly neighbors, stray cat that beat up my precious Maui (incidentally, this was Maui's only cat-friend - go figure), and so many other amazing points of interest about this street. Also please note that there is something very, very wrong with Blogger.com tonight. It seems that showcasing the bizzare, carnival-like street upon which I lived, has opened up a portal someplace - so when you try to enlarge, and how can you Not wish to enlarge this gem, it may open as an unknown file and then promp you to download it. And it's blurry, too..

Fear not, this is just proof of what I have been trying to point out.

You can see this beauty here.

Korean Dude

Hide n Seek

Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day, Marilyn

I hope you have a great day

Compass

Taken with my trusty P.O.S.

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I just backslid

I am sorry. I love these people, and that cat.

Photo Dump

Underxposed: Photo Dump



Out with the old, in with the new--also taken with my trusty P.O.S 99 cent cracked lens special. I'm dumping some images, rather posting some of my favorite ones here before I rip down the old site to rebuild it in a PHP, blogable format, where of course all the old gems will go back up again. To access the links just click on links to pull them up.

I have had a recurring

not so much a dream, not so much a night terror (and in fact I don't think any other word but haunting is really accurate) - experience where an electrical current runs through my body and lifts me up to the ceiling, where it pins me there long enough so that I can look down at the darkness below me; then I observe that although terrifying, I seem to be at one with something not good and pure. I say it's not a dream because I'm not fully asleep, but not fully awake. I'm fully aware of what's happening to me and aware that I'd rather get out of it but the process of bringing myself out seems like a battle between two wills, and the only thing that stops it is getting up out of bed, putting myself in some form of light, and leaving the room. Most of the time that stops it, though not every time. Sometimes hours, literally - I've checked the clock - of my sleep are hijacked by this not a dream sort of a but not really nightmare. I guess I do find it comforting, I mean after so many years.

And in this way I create.

Self Portrait I

Officially Bored

But then why wouldn't I be.

So my friend nun, who hates the term 'friend' tells me in her own special way that my pictures are starting to suck. Is that too harsh, she asks? No, I say. You see, if everyone were a bit more honest with each other rather than always participating in the usual mutual admirbation, we might all start to improve as artists and capturers of light.

So she gave me an assignment. A few things have been outlawed as part of that, and they are: the cat (pssst, who can also be found here), the little tim burton doll, and a few other things I won't speak of.

If you're here on this blog, take heed, I am talking to you, too.

More Laguna II

More Laguna

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In college we were each given a free Corbis account with a limit of 25 images per quarter. I thought to myself that really won't do. Hungry to just have the images on my harddrive I quickly devised the plan to get as many as I could use or want. Within half an hour I had 100. I knew I was tainting myself with greed but I didn't care. Those people's images represented something I didn't have; heart guts and soul. 6 months later I had over 400 images and still no heart guts or soul. I longed to have what they create and although I already had it deep inside, I couldn't wake up from my sleep. So I just trudged on using those images for my own purposes, mostly to design non-commercial, personal web sites or piecing together those images to create parodies of people who exist either in real life or those people I met online. They were a hit but I was still left with the problem of no heart guts or soul. I longed for my own images but it never occured to me once to use a camera.

What happens between the time we are blind and the time we see is a mystery.

Today

New photo's with my new camera.

NOT.

It's the same P.O.S, model number embarrassing. Be sure to enlarge the big flower. It makes me feel like sticking my tongue a lemon merengue pie.

The last of this little guy. I love him and I carry him around with me whereever I go, lovingly taking pictures of him. But he's not my creation and its time to let go..

From nun

This gem came to me via email, from an online friend who doesn't like the term 'friend' at all. I think we can agree her sense of humor rocks.

Top: orignal pic
Bottom: after photoshop - dressed up and ready to go

Self Portrait Doll

Bottom: charcoal
Top: charcoal + photoshop

Of forks and blogs

Surrounded by their closest utensils and ornaments, the couple pose during a wedding rehersal - with actual wedding and reception to be announced, and follow. These two share an interesting, long history.

Best viewed enlarged.

Welcome to My Satanic Blog

Oh ick—green. And that font, it's so big and bulky. Who designed this thing! Green crisis over now.

Excuse the mess while I decorate (and redecorate) the place. That color of green should be outlawed.

Top: Headless Angel

Bottom: this precious bird.

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I need some coding assistance. If you look to the right you'll see my recent post links. They're long and an eyesore. If any of you kind people has the key to shortening those, please comment that to me. Thank you very much in advance.

As promised to Cat, something weird

Middle: Tell me that weird light does not look like a camel? I don't know what it is/was.

Top: Like father, like Daughter.

We interrupt the regularly scheduled phogramming with a purge of disgust—

The other day I was clicking links and when one click led to another, and another, I was taken to a discussion on homeschooling and children, which then led me to another discussion. Actually, where I was led to really wasn't a discussion per se, but a series of web sites upon which the teachings and materials of Debi Pearl's 'To train up a Child' are not only being advocated but defended - in the name of Jesus, no less.

(You can read this post in its entirity here)

Gypsy

Me, roaming the department stores looking at all the nice things I cannot afford. And no, I am really not 'butchy' looking but this picture posted I could not resist.

And me, playing around. Picture taken in a tinted car window.

Rest

I am tired right now, and I haven't got anything new to post. I guess that goes without saying what with the date stamps and all. Maybe I'll post some recent stuff.

Thank you to all those who expressed their glee over some of these pics; the exhange has a lot of meaning to me. I have some technical questions for two of you at some point.

Maui

Another of Maui - these should be clicked-to-enlarge - well I think they should be enlarged, but then again, he's my cat and I am biased. ;)


The world according to Maui
While I am constructing a brand new, home-made pinhole camera, I'll post some images of me and my cat. Here are two of my cat, Maui.

Redemption after banking lines

Today, on my way home from the bank the sky broke open, so I pulled my car over in the no stopping zone, and clicked. The sky here in southern ca is ridiculously gorgeous today.

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A close up of my favorite tree; I think she's a Birch or a Sycamore. I know I should know that info, but I don't. Whatever she is she's been very good to me, and I believe she loves me back.

Nothing new to Post

I've nothing new to post other than some photos of the fire here in Orange County. So far I've not heard anything about how it started. Rather than post them here, all over again, I've given them their own page.

Fire Photos

In the meantime I have been busy working. And putting small chunks away for a new camera. I can almost taste a new camera, feel it in my hands; I can smell it. I can almost feel my confusion as I try figuring out its mechanism. I might even attempt to eat it. When I get it I am going to sleep next to it, even if that means booting my beloved cat out of the bed. Priorites you know.

Also; to a certain someone: no, I was not mocking in the least. Put that down on record.

I decided to post one picture taken on my way to work the other day.

ghostofgypsy.com

Update

I have moved my photosite to my old address at ghostofgypsy.com so please head there for my latest practice round. I apologize for any confusion.













"Flip The Hourglass Over"

David John's

I ran across David John's blog several months ago, and being a lurker, lurked for weeks on end. I am no longer a lurker. I'm a fan of his work.

Watch with me as he grows and succeeds. Much success and prosperity to this artist. And all of us.

God I need an Ambien

Front yard.

I almost seems that a person cannot get a single shot in the state of (southern) California without a palm tree being present.

They're everywhere; like ants. The leaves of this palm seem like paper, almost surreal. In person, the leaves also seem like paper.

Street signs near Cemetery

Black crossing




















Black/yellow crossing

Photo Dump

Laguna Beach

The sky washed out. I didn't realize that this man's head was there. Or his car.

Marcus: a gypsy from Laguna Beach, lives out on the street, smokes Marlborro reds, loves to smile, tells a wicked joke (yes I actually laughed out loud), loves jesus. Tolerated me and my camera.

I am bored.

Blah Blah Blah

A day of blah. Internet down, camera acting up, eyes blurry, temper flailing. I went to a cemetery to get some shots. There were people sitting in chairs next to their deceased love ones graves which were decorated with flowers. I just couldn't. I will go back again this week when I can be alone with the dead.

This shot was unclear and grainy so I edited it for effect.

I found a cross at the cemetery sitting under a group of trees—the sun was just perfect. Behind me were a group of maintainence people, directly ahead a group of Navy men walking across the lawn to get to the chapel to pay their last respects to their deceased one; it wasn't my day to be with the dead.

Ally

Taken January 27, 2006

But seriously, why are you here when you can see bigger images there?

Ally

Taken January 27, 2006

The days have been beautiful, distracting.

Now I am supposed to format this thing so it looks different from everyone else's blog?

I
don't
think
so ..

The second to last thing I need is another web page—the very last thing I need is a blog—but since I don't know php I have no other way to hear from 0thers.

If you're here and you've seen my weird photographs and you have any tips, suggestions, constructive criticism—please note use of adjective: constructive—or thoughts, please post a comment.

Well I think that's about it.

the love of my life, rolling